What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? Nothing, chimneys can't talk!

What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

why did the teenaged girl cry? she was about to have an abortion

What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

How do you stop an aboriginal from drowning? Take your foot off his head...

Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

What did the cat say to the towel? Meow.

Why did the carpenter cry? Somebody killed his family.

Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

Nero? As In Nero7? Septimus? Where you not killed during the raid? I read you got tortured and killed by your own out of mercy.

No just stuff on the internet when I get bored, like on facebook and stuff, why a nurse? Whats wrong? Is he ill?

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

My mom says to me are you gay and i say are you gay (What did i just do)

What's worse than getting no presents for Christmas? Ass-rape!

Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

so your in a room with mickey mouse and the lights go off, how did the lights go off mickey mouse turned them off

Q: What say one therapist to a friend? A: I'm the rapist

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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