Q: What the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a mustang? I don't have a mustang in my garage..

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Me Me, who? -You -You? but I thought you were me. - I am you, you're looking in the mirror, asshole. - No, sir i'm sorry you have the wrong house. Asshole doesn't live here.

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i named my son Frodo because he was little

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What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

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There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

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What's long and black The unemployment line

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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What did the senator do after he typed he email? He clicked the send button.

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Ask me for £1000 Can I have £1000 No get a job

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Whats the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have a Bar Mitzvah in Holocaust Germany.

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Why was the little boys mom watching tv in the living room? Better question why is she out of the kitchen.

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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You know why one side of the "v" formation of a flock of geese is longer don't you? Cause it has more geese in it.

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How do you kill Helen Keller? With a gun.

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what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

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What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I just found out my wife has cervical cancer."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Rapist :(

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My daughter got a kinder surprise with cool toy today..... i killed her i didnt even want the toy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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