How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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Why did Little Suzy get hit by a truck? Well the real question is, "Why was Little Suzy in the road," so why was she? Because she felt like it.

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

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What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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When geese migrate, why is one side of the V longer than the other? There are more birds on that side.

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An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

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Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

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What do you get when a fat kid eats a donut... A Heart Attack.

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Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?

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so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

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#If you go down in the woods today, your sure of a big surprise #If you go down in the woods today, you better go in disguise. # I don't know why, I started typing this out and realized I couldn't actually come up with a suitable concluding line.

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane> .....a pilot

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whats worse than not being able to hear? not being able to breath fvd n avt were here

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A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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Why are white people white? I don't know

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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why was the jewish man so sad because his family was killed in a bus accident and he severed his spine and cant walk ever again and his insurance couldunt pay for the bill so he is now bankrupt so he borrowed from the mafia and now owes them 100,000 in a year or they will cut off his fingers and gauge out his eyes

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges can't talk therefore this is not a accurate accusation.

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What is the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes you laugh and one is just a clown.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The UPS guy dumb ass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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