"hey do you know the date" "58"

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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Why are all the dinosaurs extinct? Because you touch yourself at night,

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the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

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"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's parents?" "No" "Neither has he"

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

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Where do cows go to have fun? Cows don't have a concept of fun as such, but they would probably go to a large, sunny field full of lush, green grass with a bubbling river and plenty of shade.

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

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A drunkard walked into a bar, and up to the bartender. He proceeded to **** the **** until he ******. I proceeded to break down in immense frustration over censorship.

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

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why did your mom die? Cuz i killed her

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What's long hard and black A drain pipe

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Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

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How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Why did the cow cross the road? He probably saw a delicious looking patch of grass on the otherside.

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What's better than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill/death ratio

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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