Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

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A Muslim man gets onto a transatlantic airliner. All the other passengers are privately nervous, but no one mentions it.

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how do you make jimmy happy you cant he's in a coma

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

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Two men were walking down the road when one of them spotted an old lamp lying in a ditch. After examining the lamp's handiwork for several seconds one man rubbed the lamp with his shirt sleeve. The men then continued down the road.

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Q: Why didn't the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

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A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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what do you call a Mexican driving a plane? a pilot you were probably to racist to work that out

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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How many kids does it take to fix a light bulb 5 1 to fix the light bulb and the others to get in the van

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Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

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Nothing is as strong as love, Except a nuclear warhead that can destroy entire cities! :P thoko like :D ~~k0mradey``

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What is the different on a black guy and a bicycle ? The black guy steals the bicycle, but the bicycle dont steal the black guy. Yes, my bike got stolen ...

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What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

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Why did old Dorris shit herself? Because Margaret fell over.

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Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

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What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

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What did the Scientist say after he created Frankenstein? - I just created Frankenstein.

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Knock, knock Who's there? The electrician And about bloody time too, you'd better come in.

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Q: Wy couldn't the T-rex grab the other Dinosor? A: Because he is extinct.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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