A rabbi and a priest walk into a supermarket... They buy food, put in their cars, drive home and cook dinner.

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why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

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What do you call a fat, ugly kid? An unloved child.

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Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

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How many like does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

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Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

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What did the man say to his father? You are not my mom.....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To cause global mayhem.

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Why are asians so good at maths? Because their culture exercises a hard work ethic in order for many of them to achieve high ranking jobs in order to support their families

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Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

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What did the guy say to helen keller nothing... according to helen keller

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? No one knows.

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How do you get rid of Herpes? You can't.

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What do you get when you cross a cow with an elephant? A deformed organism

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Q: What's the difference between Catholism and Judiasm? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

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What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

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Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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