A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

two men are standing on a roof. Man #1: do you want me to push you off a roof? Man #2: No.

How Does My cat have Sex? With Me.

What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

Anti - Jokes. com

What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

are you from tennesse? cuase you sure look like a f u c k e d up redneck

What's long and hard, and has cum in it? A cucumber

How can you help Sally who is casually gets beaten by her farther every day? Just give £3 a month to the NSPCC

a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

What do you call an African man with no legs? Murderer

Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

whats better than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees whats better than 1 baby nailed to 10 trees? 10 trees nailed to 1 baby

School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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