Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

whats the difference between a boyscout and a jew? boyscouts come home from camp

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

thumb_up thumb_down -12

No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the blind boy get for one of his Christmas present? A cinema ticket.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why was the stone green? I dont know thats why im asking -_-

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Girls Lacrosse.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yo mama so fat, that she's even bigger than the universe!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a white hankerchief dipped into the red sea? Wet.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! What's good for the goose Is good for the gander I'm Donald Trump!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than slipping on a banana peel? Amanda Todd's suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

thumb_up thumb_down -12

hers a joke... japanese people

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops