What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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what's worse than falling and scraping your knee? living within a 10 mile radius of a Japanese nuclear reactor

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Why did the chiken cross the road? To bite a rubarb stick.

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Q: Why did they laugh at the black guy? A: He told a funny joke.

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What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

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An alien, a midget, and a Jew walk into a bar... I forget the rest but your mom's a whore

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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What did the Rabbit say to the horse? They are both completly differebt species and cannot communicate. Therefore, the rabbit said nothing.

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A dog run after a squirrel. the pursuit didn't last long the squirrel climb a tree.

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What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

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Why didn't they let the black people play baseball? Because they're bigoted bastards.

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Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

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A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

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How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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A woman buys a man a Valentine's Day present.

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whats green and slimy? green slim

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How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had celebral palsy.

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Why was the Asian girl doing a math problem? It was her homework that her teacher assigned her class.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops