What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

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Whats worse then a worm in your apple This joke

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

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Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

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What did the dinosaur say to the caveman? Nothing. Dinosaurs were wiped off the earth due to a tragic, world wide extinction about 65 million years ago while small mammals which would eventually evolve into humans survived.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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Q: What's worse than finding out you have genital herpes? A: Finding out your grandmother gave them to you

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What do you do if you are locked inside a car with a baseball bat? Unlock the car

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jingle bells jingle bells,, bells were jingled!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

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that wall over there ->

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What screams when you poke it? A rape alarm.

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Is your refrigerator running? I heard there was a power outage in your area.

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knock knock come in

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What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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how do u get a clown to stop smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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Whats a lion in Antartica? . Dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops