Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

This made my day: The Japanese verb "to drink" is "nomimasu". [L]

Why did the door close on little Timmy? He was getting gang raped.

So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

SHUT UP JP

2 blondes walk into bolemics anonymous.

Where did suzie go for her Birthday? A van

How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

What did the young Muslim man have attached to him? A book-bag, it was is his first week college and he eager for an education.

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

How many cats would it take to change a lightbulb? Cats can't change lightbulbs

knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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