In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

Two trees sit in a dark forest. Between them is a small hare. The wind blows hard and rustles the trees. The hare then looks up, and then forward. He hops away.

Why did the duck walk on the moon? Because it was his lifelong goal

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

Why was the hiker upset? He was plummeting 1,500 feet to the ground after tripping on a rock too close to a cliff.

Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

What did Helen Keller say when she was hit by a bus? . : ; : . : . :

women's rights.

i have a story to tell u!!! oh s*** i forgot!

Why don't Catholics allow people to wear condoms? Because they get stuck in the alter boys braces.

What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

Cat ate a battery, did volts.

A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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