Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

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Why doesnt the chicken wear any pants? His pecker is on his head

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When does 1+1=3? When the condom fails.

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Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo. Get in the van.

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I got 99 problems but the ability to count ain't one

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Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

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Why did the black guy buy a bucket of KFC? Because he was hungry

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

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A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

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What's clear and looks like water? Water.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot... are you racist?

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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A man and a woman have drunk, unprotected sex, and 9 months later, they have a beautiful baby girl. What did they call her? An accident.

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I need a sidecart on my motorcycle just for my diick

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THE LOVE SHACK IS A LITTLE OLD PLACE WHERE WE CAN GET TOGETHER!

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

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Why were you in an igloo? I don't know, why were you?

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Your mom is so fat she is larger then the average person.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops