A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's fat and ugly? Your face ... But only if its fat and ugly

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man was feeling sick and decided to go and see a doctor. He saw the doctor and then went home. He wasn't feeling any better so he decided to get checked-out by the doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Obama cross the road? Oh, wait, he didn't make it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

thumb_up thumb_down +8

One day little billy was wandering happily through the forest.He then trips and his legs disintegrate

thumb_up thumb_down +8

are you from tennesse? cuase you sure look like a f u c k e d up redneck

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a camel walks into a bar. it is kicked out because camels are not supposed to be in bars, there camels.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the boy get teased? Because his name was spelt wrong (k)urtis

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

thumb_up thumb_down +8

All of these jokes are about white people

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why dont i play socker because im not waering socks

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the car stop? It ran out of gas.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock Who's there? The electrician, I'm here to fix your door bell.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it's delicous.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than Twilight? New Moon. What's worse than New Moon? Eclipse. What's worse than Eclipse? Breaking Dawn. What's worse than Breaking Dawn? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Breaking Dawn Part 2.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

An ant walks into a bar. Nobody Notices...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops