Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a brick.

Rush Limbaugh

"Tell me a joke" Tom says Your life.

Granny P-O-R-N!!!!

What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

What do bluejays and cardinals have in common? They both Were born during the Medevil period.

wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

Why did the man have a finger coming out of his ear? He had a birth defect.

Your friend says "Hi" What do you say back? You say "chunky salsa?" She said "what?" You think she knows you made out with her boyfriend last night. So... You blurt out " I'm SO sorry I made out with your boyfriend lastnight" Know.... Your dead meat.

Why did the old man go to the retirement home? The 75 year old man had a 45 year career in pluming and he thought it was a good time to retire after saving enough money to be happy and he could spend the rest of his life with his wife. The retirement home was also not that far away from his grandchildren so he liked the location and the home was also very clean and the workers seemed very nice. But this was just a visit to see if he liked it, he may live there soon.

What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

Why was Timmy so unpopular at school? Because he caught aids of his pet rock

Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

An Irish man, Scots man and a Welsh man walk into a bar. The barman says, "what is this some kind of joke?!" Peter, who lives in Cardiff, returned home, depressed that he is viewed as some sort of clown. It reminded him of when he was a school boy; a giant spot appeared on his nose. The kids just laughed at him. "Don't worry Peter" he said to himself, "It will all be over now... He later hung himself. His family have been informed.

Today I went to the grocery store. I purchased milk, eggs, orange juice, and my favorite breakfast cereal for $18.73. I subsequently got into my sedan and drove home.

Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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