How do you blind an Asian man You stab him six times in each eye socket and drop cyan pepper in his eye wound.

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An Irishman with a metal bar (like a pole)

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them

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Why were Billy's parents laughing at him? Because he was just diagnosed with cancer!

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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AIDS is not a lifestyle it's a choice - and you chose wrong.

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why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

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Hillary Clinton and 2 male aides were on a plane on a Friday evening which us not unusual for a secretary of state.

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Jimmy: Knock, knock, Grandmother: Who's there? Jimmy: Jimmy Grandmother: Jimmy who? And then Jimmy held back tears as he knew grandmother's Alzheimer's disease was getting worse.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

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There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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AHLTFKCITAWKSHTC

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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Who job is it to protect the forest? Obiously a male and/or female forest ranger of smokey the bear. It's that simple.

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What happend to the chicken that crossed the road? He got hit by a truck.

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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How did the little boy die? A speeding moving truck took a sharp turn, the locks on the doors broke open and a huge office desk flew out and crushed the boy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops