Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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What do you call a woman in the kitchen? Her name.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

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How many moms does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They make you do it!

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A black man, an asian man, and white man walk into a bar. Not that out of the ordinary since America is a melting pot.

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How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

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A baby walks into a bar, not long before it leaves out of the bar.

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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a disabled man takes a walk in a park

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1: Knock, knock 2: Go away!

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Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

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What's the difference between a red door and a blue door? Fat black people.

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Ask me if I'm God.. Dude, we all know you're not God.

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how many people does it take to change a light bulb....... none..................its stilll bright

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the other kids at recess? I chopped her legs off.

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knock, , knock , who's there the gas man the gas man who ? the gas man who is gonna turn your gas off !

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There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because earlier that day, the chicken was taking a shiit, and when he went to wipe, there was no toilet tissue, so he ran upstairs to his parents room, and shot them both with a shotgun, then he ate them while they were still gasping for air, then the neighbors heard the gunshots so they came over to make sure everything was alright, but little did they know that the chicken planned for it and they were electricuted to a crisp by the fence, oh yeah, why did the chicken cross the road? Because the store for chips was across the street

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Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

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Roses are red bullets are led if you don't take me back now i'll shoot you in the head!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops