Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

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What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

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what do you call a farm without animals a house with a big yard

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar. It's an average bar. However these men don't drink. The priest ordered some onion rings, the minister fries and the rabbi poutine. They're good friends despite their different religious views.

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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What do you call a computer running Windows DOS? Obselete

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Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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Why did the faggot cross the road? Because he was a faggot.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Why did the semen cross the road? Because i put on the wrong socks this morning

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Want to hear a joke? Obama

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Q: How do mentally retarted people read books A: They dont

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Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some exercise. They were getting terribly overweight.

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What's the difference between a giraffe and an erection? An erection is much easier to obtain.

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Justin with a hat.

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How did the blond become a pilot? By attending flight school, graduating, applying to an airline to which she subsequently was hired to, taking frequent training courses, and beginning work.

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Whats worse than hard cheese?Cheese DUH

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One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

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Whats the difference between the Pope and acne Acne doesn't get onto a kids face until they're 13

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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