What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

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What did the snake say to the rat?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Oh good I thought you wouldn't make it.

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Lady: I think you guys would be very happy here. Chandler: No no no no no no! No, we're not together. We're not a couple, definitely not a couple! Joey: You seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not good enough for you? Chandler: We're not going to have this conversation AGAIN!

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How do you make Adolf Hitler angry? You can't, dead people are not sentient, and hence cannot feel anger.

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What is the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything? 43 - 1 = ?

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a read head, a brunet, and a blonde sneak into a merchant ship. security hears some noises and goes on to investigate. all three girls jump into banana sacks. security guard kicks the first sack with the read head in it and she growls like a dog, so the security sees its a dog and keeps on walking. he then kicks the sack with the brunet in it, she goes on to hiss like a cat. so then the security guard kicks the last sack with the blonde in it, and she yells out "bananas!"...the end

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What do you get when you cross the motorway with a lottery ticket? You get knocked down and killed.

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why did they make a new iphone? because individuals like to be connected to local and world wide media so they can stay in touch with all news, friends and family.

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A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he got hit by a car because he wasn't aware of the dangers of not looking both ways. Bufoon

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Why did the chicken cross the road??? Suicide.

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BIG PENIS

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Roses are red violets are green i can't rhyme bridge

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I got 99 problems but the ability to count ain't one

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Those that want what is best for me, shall listen to me and do only whatever I want. Those that want ONLY what is best for me, underestimate me greatly. You who stand in the way if my will, claiming you want what is best for me, better move aside.

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Yo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

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Why did my bed broke? Becaus i had sex with your mom!

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Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

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Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops