What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

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HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

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Why did the blond fall down? She died.

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knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

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Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

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What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

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What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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how do you make jimmy happy you cant he's in a coma

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did you know r kelly and jay z had a album together?

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know; I was too busy masturbating.

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Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

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yo momma is so poor that she may not be abe to accumulate the right amount of revenue necessary for your college funding.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops