What's black and white and red all over? A seriously infected scab.

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. On of them was moderately amusing and took home the modest prize.

How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

A guy watches TMJBtv on YouTube. He then shoots himself.

How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

What do you call a man who's a gynecologist, painter and respected martial arts champion? Talented.

A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

What do you call a fucking idiotic douchebag with ebola? An ebloa paitent

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Hit it with a shovel 17 times

Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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