If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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Why did the man walk up to a bank teller with a gun? He is the security guard; he wanted to ask her for financial advice.

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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Q)what do you call a homless a man ?? A) dunno ask him what his name it (LOL RANDOMZZZ)

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If I had a nickel for everyday I lived...... I would get a nickel a day

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a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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What is long hard and woody? A tree.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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What has 8 legs and makes women scream? .....Gang rape.

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what's worse than waiting 45 minutes in an amusement park ride? getting your penis chopped off.

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I put my baby in a microwave.

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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Wanna know what a hate about instructions? I always get my dick stuck in a ceiling fan.

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Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

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What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

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Yes and no, you would have ruined what is beautiful yet different within your soul.

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Why did the chair break? The person that sat in it was over weight

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What's red and smells like green paint? Red Paint

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look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

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How do you stop a drunk driver? With a minivan and family of four.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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