What do you call a skeleton in a closet? The hide-and-seek champion.

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Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

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Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

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What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

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What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

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Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

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how do you make a boy cry you cut out his eyes

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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What is Alqueida's favorite football team? The New York Jets.

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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There is a black guy a white guy and a Mexican, whose driving. The other black guy.

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What happened while Thomas crossed the street? He got hit by a truck. What happened to Billy? He was Thomas's Siamese twin, and he too met the same fate.

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What happens if a guy is gay? You call him Verl.

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What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

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a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

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Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

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What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

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I don't have ADHD I just- Hey look a squirrel!

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Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops