Why did the bunny hit the drum? It didn't because it did not have the mental capacity or physical capabilities to do so

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

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If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

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Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

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quantum physics?

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The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

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how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

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What do you call a deer with only one leg? A one legged deer. What do you call a deer with one leg, one eye and lives in Rome? Still a one legged deer.

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how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

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Roses are reds, Viloets are blue, Thank God I'm a christian, And not a jew.

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Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

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How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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Two stoners walk into a bar. They didn't drive there because they were high and wanted to enjoy a cool, evening stroll.

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How did the boy escape the burning building? He didn't. He burned and when to hell like everyone else.

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Robin, get in the car, please.

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why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

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what do you call a gay guy? kevin

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Harry Potter: Hey voldemort, you wanna go get our noses pierced?? Voldemort: I killed your parents.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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