Why couldn't the ten-year-old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-13

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Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A:Because it wa dead!!!!!!

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once opon a time. never mind i'm just going to beat you kids.

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Guess what my nephew said yesterday? oh wait, i forgot hes dead..

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How do you make a snake blink? You can't

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

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Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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What's worse than being raped? Not a whole lot-- rape is a very serious mental and emotional strain that will stick with a person for the remainder of their life.

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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What did the Mexican, the European, and the Canadian all have in common? They weren't used in this joke the last time someone posted it on anti-joke.com.

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whats worse than breaking your arm? getting raped by a squirel

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- have you heard about the guy who got the left side off the body cut off? - no. - He died

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What do two zebras look like next to each other? Two zebras

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

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What is the difference between a white gut and a black guy? The level of melanin in their skin.

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why wont me daughter eat my feces

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

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the only people that will miss whitney huston are her drug dealer and possibly bobby brown

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What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

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How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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