What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

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yo momma so fat, it appears she has two chins

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WHY CANT THE ENGLISH MAN FIND HIS.....PANTS? BECAUSE HE NEEDED TO LOOK HARDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! LOOK HARDER ENGLISHMAN!!!!!!!!LOOK HARDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yell this joke out loud and u will realize that its really funny!!! ^-^

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Sorry Liz, his sodium levels are so bad that while he is drinking a lot, his body is not containing water, and while his pulse and breath is fine he is passing out from time to time, he is asking for stimulants Ritalin specifically, but I am not sure if his body could withstand that, I really don't mind to pry, but does he use Ritalin? I mean he chats a lot, but ADHD? I am just asking out of health concerns, not that I am a doctor, but I just worry... Flirty personality... More like a clown, he says he refuses to eat unless I breastfeed him XD. He is eating now though, solids work, never had a tougher patient, he will make it for sure.

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

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A man walks into a bar holding a magic lamp. The bartender asks "what are you holding?" The man says "It's a magic lamp." The bartender looks at the man and scratches his head. It turns out the bartender has had a problem with lice in his hair. If you believe in a magic genie is going to grant any wishes you're reading the wrong story. Anyways, the bartender buys medicated shampoo and no longer has head lice. The guy with the magic lamp was totally worthless.

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Why did a black man put his hands on a white man? They were hugging.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

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How do you save a drowning Asian teenage boy? You get him out of the water.

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Q: Why is little Timmy living without his parents? A: He is ninety seven years old!

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes, how may I help you?

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What did the Mexican guy say to the black guy? What? Nothing, he don't speak English

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

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Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

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Whats the difference between a man and a cat. There both different species.

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your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

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What is worse than a badly told joke? A badly told Anti-joke.

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knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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