Inspirational story: There once was an ugly old man who was so ugly everyone died. The end -Matt

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Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am ADD Bird

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roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this makes no sense microwave.

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"What dosen't kill you makes you stronger" Except losing your arms.

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes a noise and a second Jew elbows him so he'll keep quiet. They are heard and are all caught. It's now their turn to seek because they are playing Hide n' Seek.

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The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What is easier than making pie? Making cake!

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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a man walked into a bar and said ow

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What's good about eating every night? Knowing that an African won't.

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Q: Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? A: A burglar

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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what did the frog say to the plane HE NO CRY SO I CRY FOR HIM

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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Why are aspirins white? Because the creator of aspirin didn't feel it necessary to color the pills.

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Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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What did the black guy say to the slave driver. Nothing, slavery no longer exists.

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How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

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What was the women doing out of the kitchen? Watching the movie 'Birth of a Nation' at her father's house

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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Whats better than 1 person in your oven? 9 people in your oven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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