Nickelback

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What's worst than losing a million dollars? Losing a plane. Whats worst than losing a plane? losing 239 people, a plane and a million dollars

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Someone asks for his autograph to which he replies. "Sure"

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Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

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Doctor, doctor, I have a cavity! Go to the dentist.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they are not, they are purple. Whoever the uneducated idiot was who made up that poem deserves nothing more then a slap in the face

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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Why is this website named Anti Joke because that's what the creator wanted it to be called

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When is a door not a door? When it is a cup.

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Hi my name is Bob

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Q: Whats worse than 5,000,000 African Americans being killed? A: 1 White person being killed

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So much oil was spilled into the ocean that it is killing animals.

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What do you do when a girl you gave roofies to wakes up? Take your tongue out of her ass and run!

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The Theory of Relativity, proposed by the Jewish physicist Albert Einstein (1879-1955) in the early part of the 20th century, is one of the most significant scientific advances of our time. Although the concept of relativity was not introduced by Einstein, his major contribution was the recognition that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant and an absolute physical boundary for motion. This does not have a major impact on a person's day-to-day life since we travel at speeds much slower than light speed. For objects travelling near light speed, however, the theory of relativity states that objects will move slower and shorten in length from the point of view of an observer on Earth. Einstein also derived the famous equation, E = mc2, which reveals the equivalence of mass and energy. When Einstein applied his theory to gravitational fields, he derived the "curved space-time continuum" which depicts the dimensions of space and time as a two-dimensional surface where massive objects create valleys and dips in the surface. This aspect of relativity explained the phenomena of light bending around the sun, predicted black holes as well as the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation (CMB) -- a discovery rendering fundamental anomalies in the classic Steady-State hypothesis. For his work on relativity, the photoelectric effect and blackbody radiation, Einstein received the Nobel Prize in 1921.

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what was postman pat's name before he was a postman? Pat.

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

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Ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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GUY 1: Mann, I just got done working out, check out my forearms!!! GUY 2: You only have two silly!!

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I wish I Charlie Sheen's Dealer.

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Mmmmmmm Lemons

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Why is Jesus not real? Because Chuck Norris is still alive.

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noodles

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What do you call a goose with no arms? A goose

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What's blue and screams when you look at it Idk that's why I'm asking you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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