Why did the chicken cross the road? It had AIDS

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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A man with Azheim - Eh, I forgot what it was called.

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How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

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What did the doctor say to the seriously ill patient? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why did the Jew die? Because of old age

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 8,9,10, and 11 along with their families.

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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so a unicorn walks into a bar... and then i woke up

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Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream. Because he got hit by a bus

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What is black and white and red all over? I don't know. I was hoping you did.

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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I agree to the terms and conditions

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How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops