what's the worst part about owning a prius? telling your parents you're gay

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

Well, its Eliza again, sorry to bother you Nero, I always thought you where good looking but I know that when it comes to you its not about the looks, you are far more than meets the eye. Neo-Nero was the guy we met at a certain meeting, the arrogant guy with the big forehead whose arms where shaking remember? I wont reveal more for his sake, he did not mean bad, he was just angry like the rest of us and felt responsible, again like many of us. So when can we meet you? I assume you wont be arriving soon, but Id really apreciate seeing you again, and considering neither I nor my parents (I asked them) have the money to come visit you, id appreciate a loan or something.

A Mayor accidently killed one of the citizens of his town through dangerous driving. He could not be charged with murder, as it was an accident, but there was an uproar, and he was humiliated beyond question and forced out of office straight away. Even his family rejected him, owing to the fact that the unfortunate citizen he struck was his son's girlfriend.

Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

Why did the man drink a glass of water? Why not?

There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

A dinosaur walks into the bar, everyone panics in fear and confusion because it is a dinosaur and it's weird.

What did the doctor say to the recently diagnosed AIDS patient? I'm sorry there is nothing we can do.

Knock, knock ... ... ... Well I guess no one is home.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? I don't know, you should check the zoo's surveillance camera.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Answer: because he had no guts

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, nobody could fit inside a pineapple, nor could a pineapple survive in the sea

Why is there a black president? Cause you voted for him. Thanks! Dick.

What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

Who can walk on water? Not the guy in the wheelchair.

A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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