Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

What do you callan african american in KFC? A had working american with a average profit, trying to make a living.

what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

whats a parkour kid? someone who jumps off things and is a pre-teen with adhd

A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

How do you make an ugly person not ugly? Put a bag over their head. With,, a smiley face.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...