Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have alzheimers, hey i just met you

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What's worse than someone who isn't racist? A racist.

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A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

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I had 99 problems Solved them all

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Why did Doris need a hip replacement Because she fell down the stairs

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Why couldn't the white guy tell the two asians apart? They were identical twins.

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I'm going to rewrite history. History.

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What time did the Chinese man go the dentist? About 5 minutes prior to his appointment

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Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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your mamma so fat... she went to hell.

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An irish man and a lebanese man jump off a cliff who wins? No one it wasnt a race

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Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

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Q; what did the gangster say after he and his gang robbed a bank? A;Hey boys lets go drink some soy milk (After that his gang killed him) but the moral of the story is to not rob banks or take drugs

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what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

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what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

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A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

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There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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