Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

*Click* "Hello you have reached a pre-recorded voice at the suicide hotline. We regret to inform you that our consultant has suffered a recent bout of depression due to the sheer volume of calls he has received." "His body was found this morning, hanging from a tree." [L]

Knock Knock. Who's there? An Alzheimers's patient. An Alzheimers's patient who? To get to the other side!

Whats funnier than 24.....25

women's rights

Where is aodhan's ma? Jail, she was cought with a bag full of the white powder.

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

A guy thought it could be funny to write a joke that is not and post it on a social network. And did it

What do you call a tree that grew in the middle of a road? Whatever type of tree it was.

What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

What did Joe do after the party? He went home.

Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

What do you call a dolphin without a head? Dead.

What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

Q. What did the father say to his son? A. Nothing, he just hit him with his belt. His wife tried to intervene, but she too was hit by said belt.

Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

Q: Why do black people buy so many pairs of shoes? A: Because when they outgrow there old pair they need new shoes.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

What's the one game that black people are good at? Flashlight tag.

What is the difference between a woman and a whale? One has big whiskers and is fat and filthy, the other one lives in the sea and is a mammal

Roses are blue, Violets are red, Pansies are green, I think I'm colorblind

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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