What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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Why didn't the priest move in with the two rabbi? Because having three adults between the ages of 18 and 65 occupying the dwelling would have violated their insurance policy.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

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It is better to have loved and lost, Than to have fallen, bleeding, into shark-infested waters.

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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Q:Why is the WMBA so unsuccessful? A:Barely anyone watches it

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Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

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What did the young Muslim man have attached to him? A book-bag, it was is his first week college and he eager for an education.

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what's a snake that has no legs a snake

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A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

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why did the chinese man die because someone shot him

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Roses are red, violets are blue, This is false, Violets are purple.

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Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

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Who took the cookie from the cookie jar? Your mom

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Mum makes $97 per hour working online? Offline I can see , but online, mmm pull the other one, it plays lossless codecs

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EVERYONE, CREATE LOVE NOT WAR.. Between Josh and Dylan... WILD.. PASSIONATE.. LOVE!

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Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

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whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

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How many dead babies can you fit in a telephone booth? Mmm, strange question for my HSC maths exam...

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Why did the platypus have no friends? Platipi are antisocial creatures by nature.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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