whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

Jack and Jill went up the hill. Jill was dehydrated.

Why did Billy die? His mother killed him.

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle

What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

there is a black guy and a mexican in a car whos driving? a cop

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Rhyming is hard, Zebra.

Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

As far as I know, the day after tomorrow is going to be YOUR lucky day, because you will be tasting sausage for the first time with your lower lips... No seriously, you cant be virgin, you can tell me the truth, you like 24 or something?

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

What's the difference between shoes and babies? You can't eat shoes.

A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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