What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

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What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

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A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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How did the rock cross the road? It didn't cause it's a rock.

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Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

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Where did Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

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Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

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What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

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Q: What would Martin Luther King Jr. be if he was white? A: Alive

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What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

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Tony Romo

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

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What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? ...Neither have they.

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing it had his tongue

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Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

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Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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