What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

Person 1:Did you hear the joke about the cat, the camera, and the pancakes? Person 2: No, I haven't. Person 1: Oh, that's too bad. Person 1 then gets up and walks into a refrigerator.

whats big and white and falls from the sky\ Refrigerator

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

Why didnt the guy eat cereal? Cause he didnt have any

What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

How do you make an apple puff? Put the apple in a large pan with some water. Cover and cook gently for 20-25 minutes until soft. Add sugar and nutmeg to taste. Transfer to a bowl and leave to cool. Cover with pastry and bake until well-risen and golden.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Exactly what he had asked for because UNICEF do a wonderful job.

Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

what did the computer say to the tv? computers are not living there for they cannot talk

A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

What did the baby get for his birthday? An Abortion.

have you seen stevie wonder's house. no? Well nethier has he you

Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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