hey i just met you and this is crazy i have alzheimers hey i just met you

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

thumb_up thumb_down +9

whats the difference from a jew and a christian the jew got arrested for rape

thumb_up thumb_down +9

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You help him down.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what did the african boy get for christmas? what does his ethnicity or his place of origin have anything to do with what he gets for christmas

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

their was a black man in my family tree hes still hanging on

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

thumb_up thumb_down +9

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +9

what is the difference between Rick Perry and Lindsay Lohan? it only takes Lindsay 4 1/2 hours to finish a sentance.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

yo mama so fat she had to eat healthy food and exercise daily

thumb_up thumb_down +9

why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

antijoke is the best website.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I'm so full I could stop eating.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops