Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

Q: WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SKINNY PERSON AND A JESSE? Answer: THE SKINNY PERSON IS VERY LEAN AND THE FAT PERSON IS VERY JELL-OUS

Hey how is your wife and my kids

Whats worse than getting a splinter? Taking a shower at penn state

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

A man walks into a bar............. The bar explodes and everyone dies

What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

Sonny Bono walked into a bar. No, wait, he crashed into a tree.

What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

A man walks into a pole He breaks his nose And bleeds to death

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

Why was a white man surrounded by black men crying? He was in a support group for black men with vitiligo, which destroys skin pigments.

Error 37.

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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