Q. have you seen Helen Keller house A. niether has she

Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am a dog.

Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

A woman stopped making sandwiches.

well now

Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

Why did the blind man laugh at the book. He didn't

What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

Why does Snoop Dogg have an umberella? For shielding himself from the rain.

What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

Knock,Knock Who's there? The Police, Your under arrest for urinating on a toliet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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