What do you call the offspring of an elephant? A baby elephant.

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What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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Why cant Stevie Wonder read? Because he is blind

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Roses are red Violets are blue Columbine was funny

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why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

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Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

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Wanna hear a joke? Your life.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

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call me maybe.

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What did the man with one arm get for Christmas? A benchpress

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What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead are best friends and go shopping together.

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You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

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Who more attractive then you? No one your ugly as pooh.

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Hi, this is Luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

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jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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What did the fat man say when he saw the giant twinky on the billboard? I wish that twinky was real, because I am too poor to pay my bills, am getting audited, and cannot feed my four children on minimum wage.

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit and. the bear eats the rabbit in a whole bite without chewing...end of story...the end

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers. Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done. Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.

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i cant STAND cripple jokes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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