What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

Your gay

Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

What did the clock say to the book? I have no batteries.

Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

Me: Hey frank, wanna die? Frank: No, why? Me: (Kills Frank) Frank: Dude why did you kill Frank?

So yesterday i walked into a bar, so what?

Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

Knock Knock Who's there? Just open the damn door.

What do the NRA and PETA have in common? Both are prominent interest groups from whom political candidates try to obtain votes.

Why is the sky blue? Because it is

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

what do you call a black man who bakes bread? a baker. you racist.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i know where you live now I'm coming for you

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

Hey how is your wife and my kids

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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