What did the Christian say to the atheist? "Even though we don't share the same beliefs, I think it's great that we can still be good friends."

Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

How do you get an annoying baby to shut up? Hit it with a bat

Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

Yo Mama so ugly I don't know how she found your dad.

Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

what class did Jimmy get an A in? None, he is dyslexic

What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

Not even I believe you will ever know yourself that well ever Nero, you see what you created as a false illusion, as all of your, or rather our effort for nothing, as a pathetic attempt to create heaven on earth. In my eyes, you succeeded in doing so, and if it where for you, or more people such as yourself and I, it would have lasted, stop trying to give people what they do not deserve, and remember that making others happy will never cure the sadness and pain deep within you, only cover it. Stop fleeing from yourself, stay, get to know yourself.

What do you call a cow who can't produce milk? Utter failure.

Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

roses are red violets are blue your moms a whore thats it

There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

"Seriosly" You got a life buddy? Are you okay? Cant you see that I am totally rocking out on my imaginary air guitar which is now inside your mind? No you are not okay! Moral: YOU ARE NOT OKAY SPREAD THE WORD! INFORM THE WORLD! YOU ARE NOT OKAY! Moral2nd: "Seriously" though dawg, you cant keep watching over me all the time, I mean you I smell the hypocrisy, but are you guys AAAALWAYS HERE? DO NOT REPLY! WE REPEAT, DO NOT REPLY!rq

Knock knock stop knocking you idiot, it's the 21st century

What's better than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill/death ratio

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the koala.

Knock Knock Who's there? Nick Oh hi Nick come in

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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