Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

How do you make a baby cry? You kill its mother.

What do you call 5 black people being killed in a car crash? A terrible incident

How do you cure cancer? do i look like NASA?

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

2 men walk into a bar. You would have expected the second one to notice it after the first guy walked into it.

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

I remember in the 80's it felt like Bill Cosby was being shoved down my throat. He was always on TV with his show and those Jello commercials.

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

-Is this the Krusty Krab? -Yes, how can I help you?

what's black and can't swim? a black refrigerator

whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

What is a haiku? Are they hard to come up with? Obviously not.

This is SPARTA! SPARTA? THIS IS MADNESS! (kicks guy down well) What is hurt! Baby dont love me, dont love me, no more. Moral: The funny thing is probably that the line makes a lot more sense all of sudden does it not?

What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

what's the difference between a duck?

A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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