What's worse than a paper cut? 2 paper cuts.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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roses are red violets are red? trees are red!? who the hell cut themselves?

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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How do you fit a giraffe into a refrigerator? You cut it into pieces.

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Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

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What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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Who swept the woman off her feet? A kidnapper

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so your snowboarding in the dessert and all four of your tires pop. how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house. the answer is B. 500 squids

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walked into a bar. The Englishman ordered a lager, the Irishman ordered a Guiness, and the Scotsman ordered tap water.

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Who is yellow and cant drive straight. A man dying of lukemia

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Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

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No it doesnt..

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Maybe You'll Find Someone Else To Help You... Maybe Black Mesa... That Was A Joke...Haha...Fat Chance...

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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Why did the homeless man decide it was time to get off the streets? He wanted to save face.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Doesn't matter get in the van.

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Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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