A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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"Where are my shoes?" asked the man. "On your feet," I replied. "You are a paraplegic and have no feeling from the waist down."

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

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Whats worse them finding a worm in your apple??? finding out your adopted

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What is the difference?

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Why couldn't the girl find a date to the prom? Because she was really, really ugly.

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A muslim in Iraq was sniped in the head by US forces. He was a terrorist, who killed 18 innocent people.

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Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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What do Hitler and Jesus have in common? Facial hair.

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Last night I had a lovely chicken burger I had no mayo left so had to make do with coleslaw but enjoyed it anyway.

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Turns out he was needed immediately at a business meeting.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

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Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

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What do you call a creepy person trying to break into your house? A robber

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

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Q. How can you tell if your arm is broken? A. Break it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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