What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

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What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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I was having sex with thisgirl and now I'm going to be a dad. All because I didn't wear a condom

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Whats the difference between a nigro and a nigro... They are both BLACK!

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Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

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Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

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What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

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Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

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What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

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A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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Why did the man look in the mirror? To see his reflection.

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Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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