Knock Knock! Who's there? The doctor. You have aids.

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Three men walk into a bar. The first guy bought two drinks, the second guy bought three drinks, can you guess what the third guy bought? A tazer.,

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There once was a man from Nantucket, he was a very nice person and had many friends.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? Dead.

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Whats black and white and red all over? A chopped up dalmation...

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Do you smell that? Sex and candy?

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why are black people scared of chain saws? because it goes runnigganigganiggarunnigganigganigga

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whats white? everything thats not black, yellow, pink, red, blue, orange, purple, green, indigo, turquiose, grey, brown, khaki, gols, silver, bronze.

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What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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Inspirational speaker: "You can judge a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." Me: "Hitler loved dogs."

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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Two pandas walked into a bar. The bar was in china.

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One day... Jack: Good morning Ben: Good morning The End.

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How do you greet your great great grandmother born in 1738? Hey, what's up, hello.

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Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

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Why did the Mexican fail his english test? Because he had studied for an inadequate amount of time and proceeded to fornicate with many women, also preventing him from sleeping for the advised 7-8 hours a night.

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What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, He has died, And now will you,

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Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

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roses are grey violets are grey i am a dog woof woof

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Who didn't let the gorilla into the ballet? The people who were in charge of that decision.

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What is six foot three, plays basketball, and is black? A black dog with basketball skills and takes steroids.

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Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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