Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

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12/23/2012

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What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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roak

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Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

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How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

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Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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Dave: Hi John! John: I have Aids.

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Why does Renee suck at tetris Because she has cancer.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

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Why don't Catholics allow people to wear condoms? Because they get stuck in the alter boys braces.

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A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

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Did you hear about the Asian boy that entered the piano competition? He died yesterday.

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Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

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Why did the man crossed the busy road? Because he was sick of life.

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Yeah, I know too, its as if "Omg he has not replied in 5 seconds something must be wrong", sorry about that. Not endorphin person? That cannot be too good.

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What did the flight attendant get for Christmas? A Trebuchet from medieval times dating back to the 12th Century CE.

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what did the obese kid get for chistmas? an athsma attack ,which led to death.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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