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why wasnt johnny in math class?....he slipped and cracked his skull on his way there, he is now recovering at the hospital

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Why did the puppy get shot? It lived in Detroit.

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Ready for something funny? nothing

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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why did the supermodel have sex with the janitor? she loved him. and he was brad pitt.

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Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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Every Good Boy Deserves Fibromyalgia

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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What did the man say to his dead wife? "I'm Blind."

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What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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What's more sad then a dumpster full of dead babies? The live one at the bottom.

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What's worse than speaking to a Russian bear? Gettting mauled and eaten by one.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

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what is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babes. when i saw the Porsche i told the guy nice car and he was like yea whatever then i went and killed 50 babes and lost conciseness when i woke up i saw the Porsche again and thought what a nice car and when i saw the babes i thought what kind of monster killed all those babes

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What do you call a black man who likes watermelon and fried chicken? Someone who likes good food.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Depending on the amount of saliva you produce each lick the answer to this question varies species to species.

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Why did the Indian cross the road? Trail of Tears.

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A man, John, is talking amongst a group of friends. He tells a racist joke and sees that one of his colored friends, Mark, is laughing at his joke, but John can tell that Mark's offended. John later apologizes to his friend because that is the right thing to do.

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A duck walks into a store and asks the clerk, "do you have any grapes?" The clerk says no, and the duck leaves. The next day, the same duck walks back into the store, and asks the clerk if they have any grapes. The clerk, slightly annoyed, says no again, and the duck leaves. The next day, the duck walks back in and asks again if they have any grapes. The pissed off clerk says, "No, and if you ask again i'm gonna nail your feet to the floor. The duck leaves. The next day, the duck walks back into the store, and this time he asks the clerk, "do you have any nails?" The clerk says, "Yes." The Duck leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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