Why didn't the mexican have a job? because he was working on his masters degree

Why did the blonde stare at the juice carton? Because a man was pointing a shotgun at her and would kill her if she didn't do it.

why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

Why did the man run over Suzy? He was a serial killer

A duck walks into a bar "Can I have some brandy, please" says the duck The bartender then proceeds to make millions because he was the first to discover a talking duck

What do a Fascist and a Democrat both have in common? Involvement in politics.

What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

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What's the hardest thing about eating a quadriplegic? The wheelchair.

What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He couldn't, his legs were broken

So theres a man, a horse, and a piglet in a helicopter. Upon noticing this, the pilot jumps out of the plane and the animals go crashing to their doom.

What's funny? Nick Sotelo

How did the man eat 100 mints in one bite? I'm not sure myself, but we can agree on one thing, his breath is gonna fresh.

What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

Why did the chicken go cluck cluck oh baby yeah balloon your mama oops did kangaroo say? I had sex with your wife and stole your car keys.

So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

Jeff

Why did the chicken die? Because it was crossing a busy road.

Why was the boy crying in public with no clothes on? Because he had no clothes on in public.

roses are red viloites are sour open your legs and give me an hour

Roses are blue Violets are red Is that really What I just said?

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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